Humphrey's Wonderful Life
by Bloodlustful
Summary: Humphrey becomes saddened and despondent after unintentionally causing problems for his fellow wolves, to the point he wishes he'd never existed. But Paddy and Marcell show up to teach him just how important he is and how true it is that he mustn't think such things. Parody of "It's A Wonderful Life" the classic 1946 Frank Capra film and an early Christmas present to Humphrey fans.


Season's greetings, everyone! I am back with my latest Alpha And Omega fanfic, and frankly I'm surprised there hasn't been a fic like this already(unless there has, which I do indeed give a sincere apology for misjudging if this is so). In this story, a parody of "It's A Wonderful Life", I have it so that Humphrey, after inadvertently causing calamities aplenty for the other wolves, is cursing himself, becoming depressed and even considering offing himself, wishing he had never been born. Thankfully, though, his guardian angels, who just happen to be those two golfing geese, Paddy and Marcell, find out of his predicament and low point and use a magic dust of theirs to help him see how vital he is to both Jasper Park and those around him. Although it is at the end of November this is published and therefore quite early for a Christmas gift, I mean this as a Christmas present to Alpha And Omega fans, especially fans of Humphrey.

THINGS TO NOTE:

This story takes place three weeks after the events of "Alpha And Omega".

I own none of the characters. They all belong to Alpha And Omega. Nor do I own anything having to do with "It's A Wonderful Life".

I also don't own the song "Auld Lang Syne" featured in this story, obviously.

Humphrey's Wonderful Life

Humphrey was unable to believe what a low point he was at right now. Not only had he woken up and unintentionally injured Tony when he was stretching and yawning and bumped the bad disc in his back, but even as he had apologized to him and Tony, despite how much it hurt in addition to made him mad, had made it clear to Humphrey he didn't mean it and he shouldn't be worried about it, Humphrey's disaster causing, all of it unintentional, did not end there.

Following his accident with Tony, he ran out to jump into the lake, but once he did, he inadvertently caused a splash which drenched Lilly, who was drinking there at the time, and he caused her to fall in, too. She pushed herself out, and Humphrey apologized profusely once he saw what he had done. While she forgave him, Humphrey's problems were not over yet. Not by a long shot.

Besides how he, while walking away from the lake with a bit of distress, caused Winston to trip over him due to not seeing him until it was too late, he turned around to apologize to the old wolf as he got up, only to knock Eve over. He apologized to both of them quite rapidly, and while Winston was a little irritated and Eve was miffed as hell, both pardoned him for how he'd obviously not meant to.

Still, when he said hi to his pals Salty, Shakey and Mooch, they were talking to Candy, Sweets, Reba and Janice, and Humphrey showing up made the girls unable not to laugh and in the next instant mock the other boys that they didn't have a girlfriend, while Humphrey had an alpha for a mate. But then they suddenly felt shitty, while Salty, Shakey and Mooch got pissed at Humphrey for showing up just then and causing this. Humphrey was ashamed and said he was sorry as he walked away.

Then came how Humphrey happened across Garth, Hutch, Can-Do, Claw and Scar, and while it initially was a quick hello between him and them, Humphrey suddenly had a sneeze of sorts and didn't have any time to cover his mouth. He sneezed all over them, became nervous in addition to embarrassed and apologized, and Garth, knowing like the others Humphrey had not intended this, simply spoke for himself and them all when he sighed and told Humphrey to just get out of their sight for the time being.

Humphrey nodded and walked away in even greater shame than before, thinking: "Damn. This is NOT my day!" But it was the last straw with what he unwittingly did to Kate. Because as soon as he saw her, saying: "Kate! My, aren't you a sight for sore eyes!" "Hi, Humphrey!" Kate let out as she ran towards him and vice versa. "Sounds to me like today hasn't been on your side but I can make it so that…" Unfortunately, she collided with Humphrey with her nose, and as a result, she broke her poor nose.

"OOOOOWWWWWGGHHH!" Kate cried out. "BY NODE ID BLEEDIG!" "Oh, dear God! Kate, I'm so sorry…" Humphrey started, but Kate let out: "TAY BAG, HUFFREY! ZITH IDDNT YO FOT, BUDDIT TILL HURTH IKE ELL! JUTH GO! AHLL GETH BAG TOO YU WHED ID TOPS BLEEDING!" Realizing he was in no position to argue, Humphrey simply just took off and ran all the way to his den, wishing by this point he didn't exist.

He had finally reached his breaking point. It was bad enough he'd caused all of those other disasters, but for him to hurt his mate, and in such a way as that, even accidentally, no less? That sent him right over the edge and made it so that he wasn't able to think straight one bit. He was in his den and feeling guilty as much as sad, distraught, distressed and under despair and a lot of self loathing.

In fact, he was saying to himself: "Goddamn you, Humphrey! How could you do all of this? What the fuck is wrong with you? It's not even noon yet and you've caused disasters galore for the wolves around you in Jasper Park! Including your own mate! You broke poor Kate's nose and that was after all the other calamities you caused! Fuck! I'm nothing but a source of pain and trouble and havoc to those around me. I wish I had never been born."

Suddenly, he saw both Paddy and Marcell in front of him, going: "Huh? Paddy? Marcell? What are you two doing here?" "Well, we were visiting and playing golf near where you wolves live at first," Paddy said, "but then me and Marcell saw you walking to your den looking really dejected, so we decided to check things out." "And really, Humphrey, after all we've heard, you really wish you'd never been born?" Marcell asked him. "You don't understand." Humphrey an instant later said. "I've hurt those around me, even if unwittingly. I've caused disasters. It's no wonder I'm an omega. I'm just a disaster waiting to happen. The world would be better off if it were without me."

"Let us see if the world agrees with you, Humphrey." Paddy said. "For it just so happens that me and Marcell have recently created a special magic dust which can do anything we want it to." "So we," Marcell told Humphrey, "are going to use it to show you a world without you, one in which you were never born, with us as your guides." "Okay, let's see it! I think it'll be pretty heavenly, anyway!" Humphrey said. The geese nodded and took out the dust, then put it right the fuck to work.

With a throwing out of and series of commands to it, Humphrey and both of the geese got teleported away. They were out of sight in this world, but reappeared in Humphrey's den. What? "Wait…we're still in my den." Humphrey pointed out. "Ah, but this isn't your den!" Paddy said to him. Marcell then said: "This is an empty den, just as all of the wolves living on Jasper Park Mountain have an empty feeling right now!"

"Huh?" Humphrey asked, and then Paddy explained: "Since you were never born, there is no one who lives in this den, and let's check out how everyone else is feeling right now." The three of them went out, and they saw Garth and Kate together, with Humphrey opening his eyes wide and going: "Garth? That's Kate with him! Hey, she's mine! You're married to Lilly!" But Marcell then said: "Humphrey, they can't hear you." Humphrey then said: "Right…since I never was born in this world, no one can hear, see or smell me."

"Nor us, due to the way our magic dust designed this world." Paddy told him. "Anyway, I think you can see Kate married Garth to bring the packs together, but let's look at their faces." It was followed by them running down to look at them, and both wolves were looking melancholy as much as sad and drained. "Christ…" Humphrey gaped. "They look unhappy as hell." "They are." Marcell stated. "Because they can tell they weren't meant for each other despite not by any means disliking one another. And they're too depressed to even speak."

It tore Humphrey's heart in two to see Kate so sad and morose, and even when he called Garth "Barf" a while back, he never would have wished this on him. "But can't something be at all done about this?" asked Humphrey. "Not in this world." Marcell told him. "This is how it is permanently, since you never existed here." "Next, the ones called Salty, Shakey and Mooch." Paddy stated. "Hey, those are my pals!" exclaimed Humphrey.

But Paddy shook his head sadly and said: "Not here, they aren't. You can't be friends with someone if that someone doesn't exist." "And look at them." Marcell said. "They are all disorganized, badly injured, bored out of their skulls and lonely. Sometimes one of those, other times all of those and still more times any combo of those. All because they're without a leader who can help guide them. A leader like you."

"NO!" Humphrey cried out. "Salty! Shakey! Mooch! I'm your leader! I can help you!" "They can't hear you, remember? We've already told you that." Paddy stated. "You were never born here." "Right…I've gotta remember I never lived in this world…" Humphrey said. "But the way they look…longing for someone else to be with…and in such poor shape…" "It's one of the many ways your presence in the actual world is so important, Humphrey." Marcell said.

"Now let's see how Lilly is doing." Paddy spoke. The three went to Lilly's den, and, to his distraught anguish, Humphrey saw that Lilly was looking down in the dumps and outright depressed in the worst way, with Candy, Reba, Janice and Sweets trying to comfort her. Then Humphrey asked: "Why is she so unhappy, though?" "Because Lilly doesn't have a mate. She wishes she does, and she feels lonely and dejected because of that." Paddy replied. "Being an omega she can deal with. But being so lonesome and with no mate is enough to break her poor little heart." Marcell explained.

"The other girls consoling her aren't too happy, either, both for how they take pity on her and wish there was an omega they could see as an example of how anyone can succeed. Which, in your world, marrying an alpha, you were. But given you were never brought into existence in this world," Paddy put across, "you can tell they've got no such thing at all." Humphrey felt like he was on the verge of tears by this point, but Paddy said: "We've got one last thing to see here. It's how Winston, Eve, Hutch, Can-Do, Claw and Scar are feeling right now. About Tony."

Humphrey looked confused, so Marcell said: "Come along and you'll understand." The three went to where those wolves mentioned were, and Winston was hanging his head in utter sadness while Eve was trying to comfort him. Hutch was trying to do the same and so was Can-Do, while Claw and Scar were quite upset and howling in mourning. Humphrey didn't get why the hell this was, but Paddy explained: "As you can see, all present here are quite said, with the likes of Winston, Claw and Scar particularly so. This is because the former has lost a friend and the latter two have lost a leader."

"You mean Tony?" Humphrey asked. "Wait…he's not dead, is he?" "Oh, yes he is." a reply from Marcell came out as. "You see," Paddy clarified, "Tony didn't realize that Garth and Kate would be unhappy with each other if married to bring the packs together until after it had happened, and he felt guilty that his being a stickler for law and tradition caused such upset for a good she-wolf like Kate and especially for his son Garth. Said guilt got to him so badly that he, well, offed himself."

Humphrey's eyes opened wide and he said: "You're lying…" Paddy and Marcell pointed to where Tony had impaled himself on a branch after throwing himself onto the sharp tree branch in question, and Humphrey gaped at the ghastly and tragic sight of his corpse. Additionally, he saw Kate going near the same tree, and said: "Hey! That's Kate! What's she doing?"

"Just watch." Paddy said. And Kate hurled herself onto another sharp brand, impaling herself and dying in the process. "KATE! NO!" Humphrey cried out, starting to shed tears, but Marcell then said, after shaking his head along with Paddy: "You see, Humphrey, Kate got sad enough when things turned out as they did so she decided to send it all."

"Had you existed, it would have turned out much differently and much better. To say not a thing of much happier." Paddy told Humphrey. "That's all we have to see here that really matters, but do you still wish you were never born?"

"Of course not!" Humphrey cried out. "So many sad and/or lonely wolves, one of them dead and my mate married to someone who she doesn't even love, nor vice versa? And now my beautiful wife, Kate, is dead?" He also saw a shock Eve and Winston now crying for their dead daughter, and Lilly, walking over just then by chance, becoming shocked and bawling her eyes out for her dead sister.

Humphrey cried a bit more and spoke: "Among so, so many other things? I should have seen how important I was before! Say this can be altered! Say it can be changed! Undone! Reversed! Whatever! I want to live again! I can't believe I was so dumb as to wish I'd never been born! Bring me back to my world of before! Please!"

"Oh, we will. We're done here." Paddy stated. And with another use of magic dust, they all returned to the world of before, where, by this time, it was night. "I'm back in my den? This is the true world? Where I did live and still do?" Humphrey asked. "It sure is." Marcell told him. "THANK GOD!" Humphrey yelled out, and he said: "You guys, thank you. Thank you so much. I had no idea I was so important. I'm now wiser than I was before, and I can assure you I will not be ever wishing ill of myself like this again! You've done your job perfectly, and I'm so happy to be back to where I was previously!"

"You're very welcome, Humphrey, and thanks." Paddy told him. And Marcell added on in: "You have a lot to be thankful for, and the other wolves have a lot to thank you for, as well. I can tell by our magic dust that they've more than forgiven you, can tell how distressed you were by all that happened today and wish to cheer you up with a special surprise." "Go and enjoy it, in addition to knowing they know you're sorry and accept your apology without your even saying it. We can tell this by our magic dust, as well." Paddy added in. "And remember…no wolf is a failure who has friends!"

Humphrey nodded and he ran outta his den and went out into the grounds and grasses to greet the other wolves who were there waiting for him. "Lilly! Winston! Eve! Tony! Claw! Scar! Garth! Can-Do! Candy! Sweets! Mooch! Shakey! Salty! Reba! Janice! KATE!" Humphrey cried out. "It's so good to see you all!" "It's good to see you, too, Humphrey!" Kate said. "And we are well aware you didn't mean any of what happened today, are indeed sorry for it and we wish to cheer you up!"

"I was told that by Paddy and Marcell, who showed up to purge me of my self-doubt, and I look forward to it! So what's the surprise you've got in store for me they told me of?" excitedly asked Humphrey. "Why, this!" Lilly said. And Kate, after saying: "In your honor, Humphrey, in addition to as a nod to how important and good you are…" began to sing. "Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should auld acquaintance be forgot and days o' lang syne!"

The other wolves then sang in unison with Kate: "For auld lang syne, my dear. For auld lang syne. We'll take a cup o' kindness yet for auld lang syne! For auld lang syne, my dear. For auld lang syne. We'll take a cup o' kindness yet for auld lang syne!"

Humphrey was moved, and a single tear of joy came out of each of his eyes. He let out a loud, long howl into the sky, and so did the other wolves. It was clear to Humphrey on this nice, beautiful night, in contrast to the bright but bothersome day he'd had before learning what he'd now forever understand, that he was one wolf who did indeed live a wonderful life.

THE END

So, how was it for you, A&O fans? Especially you Humphrey fans? Please rate and review, everyone, and, while it's incredibly early to say this, much like it is to post this fanfic, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all!


End file.
